Surliness City

What up dudes? Here are some things. The first thing is that Virgin America lets you send messages to anyone on the plane. Hot huh? Lyndal did not use this feature to pick up dudes she just sent me messages but you all know how ridiculous Lyndal is. The second thing is that Lyndal and I are getting more masculine. A ha no we are serious our body hair is getting darker and coarser. Way to go hormones in America! But really this is distressing HFCS is pretty gross but hopefully won't make us into men.

Some quotes??

Webber: How will you make your menstrual art now?
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Shara: What is that thing that Sam likes where you run up the walls?
Lyndal: What... Spiderman?
(I was talking about parkour)
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Shara: Man you should have seen the arrivals hall when I got to Heathrow! There was like 450 people lined up in this zig zag formation
Lyndal: Wait.....in Sizzler or Pizza Hut??
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I LIKE IT!!!!! - Webber on Peter's moustache
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Some reviews????

Food Review: Days 3 and 4

Carl’s Jr Burger w/ Guacamole
This burger was awesome until I found out it has 85 grams of fat in it! Madness! Lyndal said it tasted like a taco on a bun or something but I dunno about that. It could be greatly improved by jut having avocado on it instead of guacamole which is just an excuse to add weird stuff like stabilisers etc.
Rating: 4 stars
Contains buttsauce: absolutely

Carl’s Jr Chips
These were big chunky chips, cooked with the skin still on them. They were pretty great.
Rating: 4 stars
Contains MSG? Unknown

Quizno’s Traditional Sub
This is pretty good. Everytime I go in this place the server totally ignores what I say and just hands me anything and I enjoy that. Today I asked for a small sub and got a regular so I had to throw out half of it because they put so much crap on their rolls that they end up weighing about half a kilo. I think there is a yellow capsicum that may or may not be on drugs in this roll so DELICIOUS!
Fat: 156 grams (probably)
Contains MSG? Hope so!

Toll House Icecream Sandwich – Mint
Lyndal: I was mega excited about ice cream sandwiches and picked out this sandwich with mint ice cream and round pseudo-brownie biscuits. This was entirely delicious but I had to give the last quarter to Webber because I was way too full after dinner. Tasted like a frozen mint slice.
Rating: 5 stars
Contains HFCS? Forgot to look! Likely.

Toll House Icecream Sandwich – Cookie
This tasted like an arse end of a Maxibon. That’s not really a bad thing.
Rating: 4 stars
Contains HFCS? Probably

Food Review: Day 5

In-n-Out Double Double Burger
Tasted like a hamburger
Rating: 3 stars

In-n-Out Fries
These were cut behind the counter and then immediately cooked which was cool, but the flavour was nothing to write home about.
Rating: 3 stars
Contains MSG? Unknown

Juji Fruits
Juji fruits are basically soft fruit jubes. They were okay but not particularly memorable. Hard and fruit jubes in New Zealand shit all over these.
Rating: 3 stars
Contains HFCS? Yes


Hotel Review: New York
Pretty standard room with two queen beds, but this one has a refrigerator AND free internet that goes pretty fast AND free breakfast! It is also close to the subway but I don’t know how much good that will do us because public transport in New York is terrible. The cups they give us are paper because we are not to be trusted with plastic. There is a fancy airconditioning unit that seems to be heating the room very well. On the other hand, the dude at the front desk couldn’t work out my name even after I spelled it out and gave him my ID which had my name WRITTEN RIGHT THERE, the room has curtains that don’t close, and once again the room has no lights, only lamps. The view from our window is of the subway which passes by frequently. This is noisy BTW.
Rating: 4 stars
Cost: $105 per night (4 people)

Hotel Review: Las Vegas
We upgraded this room for an extra $5 or so because we heard the basic room just gave you a view of the wall. We ended up getting a pretty good view of the arse end of the Las Vegas strip and the massive tower which is the hotel’s gimmick. At the base of the tower was a huge electronic billboard that was pretty much directly outside our window. A significant proportion of the advertised products involved stripping. Anyway the room itself was reasonably fine; two queen beds, a tv, a bathroom and a bucket for ice. No wifi though. The hotel also included a casino and a McDonald’s which probably not many other hotels can claim, except for every other hotel in Vegas. The check-in procedure was incredibly inefficient and we had to wait in a massive line for about half an hour, so that was annoying. Also the plug on the sink in the bathroom was broken and took me ages to fix.
Rating: 3 stars
Cost: $66 per night (3 people)

Hotel Review: Los Angeles
Well in this hotel the toilet broke! Fancy that, I don’t! It had kinda reliable wireless but tragically the ice machine would only give you three ice cubes. This was not the sexy icy welcome to America that Webber expected! The best part about this hotel was the room across from ours. It had no handle as it looked like it had been broken into at some stage and they just stuck a metal plate on top. If you opened the door it just looked like a normal hotel room but OBVIOUSLY SOMETHING REALLY FREAKY HAD HAPPENED THERE AT SOME STAGE. I said to Lyndal that it was like a Murakami novel and if we went in there (this was at 3am) we would meet someone real weird and it would be scary but interesting. We did not do this as we are not protagonists in a Murakami novel (sadly).
Rating: 3 Stars
Cost: $107 per night (3 people)